July 2007

  When I first moved up here, I constantly worried about my appearance when going places in public. I had all of the normal fears that all transgendered people face such as...

 Do I pass in public as female?

 Do people see a man in a dress?

 Are my mannerisms feminine enough?

 Ect. Ect.

  Much to my surprise, nobody seemd to notice anything out of the ordinary or if they did they were too polite to say anything. I started out wearing a size 12 to 14 clothes and always felt that I was way out of proportion to look female. At 170 pounds I knew in my own mind that in order to look better and more feminine I had to get rid of a lot of the extra poundage. I can happily say now that I am down to 145 and wearing a size 8. Don't get me wrong, I'm by no means saying that bigger women aren't feminine looking. I personally know a lot of women, both genetic and transgendered, who are very beautiful and could teach me a lot of things. For me personally, it was my opinion of myself, that prompted me to lose the weight and inches off my body.

  Beginning the hormone therapy has had a lot to do with my waist size shrinking I believe. One of the effects of the hormones is the shifting of body fat to other areas. Looking in the mirror I can see my hips beginning to round out more so I know they are doing their jobs.

  I started out on a very low dosage since the gynecologist who was administering them wanted to make sure my body could handle them. The first dosage she gave me was 0.5 mg of Estradiol which I took 1/2 a tablet a day and also 50 mg od Spironolactone twice a day. When I went for my lab work, everything came back working properly such as kidneys, liver, lipids level. She had also requested testosterone levels and Estrogen levels. My testosterone level returned as 74 out of a possible 154 so that is looking good. My estrogen level is increasing but I can't recall the figure off hand. After seeing the tests come back so well she doubled my Estradiol dosage so my estrogen level will increase more now and the secondary characteristics should begin to develope more.

  I'm still going to therapy sessions twice a month so I can conform to the Harry Benjamine Standards of Care. My only problem I have at the moment is finding a new doctor to administer my hrt since my gynecologist has had to leave the clinic I go to for family illness. I've already notified my therapist so she can assist me in finding another one.