I'm not for sure whether it was from my fear of being alone that started this relationship or what it was but it seemed like everything happened so fast. One day I was ready to go back to Kansas and the next day I was getting married again. This marriage seemed to be working out alright while I was working full time and had a steady income coming in but once I got hurt on the job in 2002 things started to go downhill. Not being able to get the proper medical treatment I need due to insurance reasons made depression again become a part of my life.

  I was on occassion able to express my feminine side when she was gone someplace but not as often as I would have liked. When I got hurt our total income dropped from close to $1800 a month to just over $500 month so bills started piling up and in turn caused us to lose our house and lot because we couldn't afford the payments any longer. So after a few phone calls and discussion we loaded a 26 foot Penske truck and headed to Kansas. Financially it was good for us but emotionally it was hard. During the first year out there her elderly mother passed away and then in 2004 we suffered a devastating fire which totaled our house and contents. Luckily I was smart enough to insure the place for more than I paid for it plus had the contents insured separately so once we got our settlement checks we moved back to Florida. Everything was going pretty good there with her working full time and it allowing me lots of time for expressing my true self. After about a year and a half there the burden of keeping my true self hidden became so strong that one night in bed I just came out and told her about it. I expected to hear all the things you hear people tell about in the trans world but oddly enough she told me she didn't mind as long as the kids weren't around.

   After about 4 months I could see a steady change in her about my dressing female until finally she decided it was no longer acceptable for me to do it around her at all and never around the kids. She then made it a point to have her schedule changed so that she was home during the day and the kids at night leaving me no personal time to myself. Everyone around me who had always seen me as happy-go-lucky were now seeing me as depressed and withdrawn. Finally it got to a breaking point where I had to get away from that situation so my now roommate and I came up with the foolfroof plan for him to fly to Florida and rent a car and pick me up then we'd return to Minnesota together. By the time she realized I was gone we were on the plane home. Since arriving here, I have lived full time in a female role and have never been happier in my life. I have since had the needed surgery to repair my neck, began therapy, and just recently began hormone replacement therapy which is a major step in transitioning.