One of the hardest things most transgendered people face is how to come out to family and friends. I know I went for most of my life doing everything possible to hide this from them. The breaking point, so to speak, for me was at the end of my last marriage. So many people told me, including family, told me that my "brainstorm" with leaving my ex wasn't one of my better ideas. Not the fact of leaving so much but the way I had planned to do it. I'll admit it might not have been the best solution but at the time it was the only way I could think of to avoid an ugly confrontation.

   I knew both in my heart and in my mind that it was something that had to be done. I also knew that being as vindictive as my ex was it wouldn't take long for her to phone everyone of my relatives and friends she could phone to let them know I was transgendered. Knowing this in my mind, it provided a new problem for me to consider. Thus prompting me to break the news to my family myself. I wasn't sure just how I was going to go about doing this so I decided to send a short but sweet email to them. It actually surprised me when just a few minutes after sending it I recieved a call from my mother asking what was going on. Talk about terrified. After explaining the best I knew how in a short time and a few times in person after that she told me that no matter what she would always love me and support my decission. With her saying that it felt as though a huge burden had been lifted from my shoulders.

  After moving to Minnesota my mother and I had talked a few times on the phone and sent emails back and forth but somehow seemed to avoid the subject of my being transgendered. In my mind I didn't want to push the issue with her as I figured I would give her plenty of time to ponder what was said before I left. Well the subject arose again the other day when she asked me if I had given anymore thought about surgery ( SRS ). Needless to say I couldn't avoid talking about it any longer. I wrote a detailed reply to her explaining about my therapy sessions every two weeks and beginning hormone therapy 3 months ago and living full time in a female role since October of 2006. I also gave her the URL for this web site so that she could read what was going through my mind all through childhood. I think she learned things about my life that she never knew took place since there were 21 years we were separated by adoption. I wouldn't say I worried about her reaction to my web site but mostly wondered what it was. So many things went through my mind. But I have to admit that when I got her reply today about it, I was almost in tears. Not tears of sadness by any means but tears of joy.

  She told me that upon reading my site she was greatly impressed and very much enlightened. Hearing that from her was a tremendous relief to me but the part that almost brought tears was her telling me I was a good daughter and she loved me. Those few words are ones I'll never forget and always cherish deeply. No matter what else happens during my transition, nothing will ever compare to the meaning of those few words to me.